Steam rollers, breasts, and Simon eating his words.

Hey all,

I'm just gonna dive right in.

First, please watch this. I almost started crying. Unfortunately, I can't embed it, so please click the link. Please.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

For more on this amazing woman, click here.

Now, onto some news:

First, lets talk about drinking. Now, if you've had a few to many at the local brew pub and don't really want to walk home, what do you do? Call a cab? Grab a ride with a friend? Suck it up and stagger home? Some would say that these are all viable options, but not one man from Pflugerville, Texas. Last night, Pflugerville police found 32 year old Ronald Howell driving a steamroller home from the bar. The $180,000 Dynapac Vibrator Roller was sitting at a construction site, and I guess Ron got cold and felt like he needed to drive home instead of walking. The police report states that the vehicle was actually weaving in it's lane of traffic, and to worsen the danger, it was 4:00 AM, and the machine did not have any lights on. Ronald was arrested for drunk driving. I think that's funny enough by itself. I don't have anything else to say. More here.

Next, a more serious issue. Yesterday was April 15th. Not only is that my darling Grandma Margy's birthday, it is also the last day to file your federal income taxes. Now, I have many issues I could talk about here, including just how unconstitutional it is to impose income taxes and the fact that there is no statute saying you have to pay your taxes, but I would like to instead discuss the highly debated TEA parties that happened all over the country. TEA in this sense stands for Taxed Enough Already, and the movement was lead primarily by Republicans. Essentially the point that protesters wanted to get across is that the government is spending our hard earned income irresponsibly. I have a few friends that were bashing these demonstrations, and I would like to counter with a few points. First off: This is a prime example of freedom of speech. I don't care what they were protesting. Every citizen of the United States of America has the express right to peacefully demonstrate their own point of view, and I stand by this right. Censorship leads to ignorance and narrow mindedness. Even though you may think something is stupid, at least it motivated you to think, or at least form an opinion, a practice that seems to be disappearing. Secondly, If you take a peek at some of the spending that the White House has already done this year, you will see that the earmarks put into the budget are downright absurd. $160 million dollars went to farms in the Midwest to study the odor caused by pigs. Why did this show up in our spending budget? Especially when we are faced with a giant recession...that our President keeps promising to get us out of? I have the answer. It's about who you know. Lobbyists in Washington can manipulate their demographics, and work their own agendas into national matters. I don't think this is necessarily wrong, but I don't think pig odor research is as important as saving our country's ass. On the flip side, where do we draw the line? If we institute regulation on these matters, we are straying away from what it means to run a democracy. Anyway, before I get too off-topic, this is what I think: The people that got out there and tried to point out that our government is not spending money as wisely as it should be are doing what they should do. They are expressing their thoughts and feelings as every American should.
More here.

Okay, enough politics. I have some advice for all you ladies out there: Don't get breast or buttock implants anywhere but a licensed implant institute. That may seem like pretty obvious advice, but read on...A man was recently arrested in Spain for running a small side business out of his home. He had been using veterinary injection instruments to perform the aforementioned procedures for ultra cheap. His house was found to be filthy and inhabited by three dogs, a parrot, and two cats. He was only caught because one disgruntled customer submitted a complaint due to her sub-par breast enhancement. More here.

Last news story for tonight...I think this is one of the most depressing things I've ever seen. I gave up all hope for humanity. Yesterday in Myrtle Creek, Oregon, a woman hit a teenage boy with her Honda. He was knocked onto the hood and windshield, and then the ground as she came to a stop. He didn't appear to be injured too badly, and the woman got out of the car. She then handed the boy a $5 dollar bill and told him not to tell on her. Then she drove away. Luckily, the kid wasn't stupid, and he called the police. He sustained minor back and knee injuries, and the Myrtle Creek police department is investigating the hit and run. More here.

Now, all I have to say is, "What were you thinking? You and the drunk steamroller guy! What is this?" I'm sorry that I report on stupid news stories like this, but I feel like sometimes it's better to acknowledge the idiots around us and learn from them to just ignore them. Oh well. I'm amused either way. :)

Okay. My life.

I declared an English major today. I'll let you know how that progresses.

I have started submitting some of my poetry, which can be found here to on online magazine called Illiterate Magazine. They are pretty cool. Check it out. I'm trying to get published. :)

And really, that's life at the moment. I have some new surprises coming soon for the blog, but you just have to wait. More on that later.

I love you all,

-Brad

P.S. Here is your entertainment for tonight.